Dire ses 4 vérités
You're having friends for dinner at your house. Your best friend, who's always fashionably late, strolls in an hour after everyone else has finished the appetizers. You decide it's time to let her know what's what: "Listen, let's not beat around the baguette here. You're always late, so late that I'm starting to think you're just trying to make a grand entrance into your own life. Next time, I'll send your invitation with a GPS tracker, so you can find your way here before dessert chills!" You just told your friend ses 4 vérités - her 4 truths.
The French expression dire (à quelqu'un) ses quatre vérités means to speak frankly or bluntly, often delivering a harsh or unpleasant truth to someone. It's often used when someone feels the need to confront someone else about their behavior, actions, or decisions. They’ve been politely biting their tongue for a while and finally decide to let it all out, dropping truth bombs like it's a verbal D-Day.
The expression translates into English as giving (someone) a piece of one's mind, letting it all out.
Dire ses vérités - to tell one's truths - is easy to understand. The question is: what's the number 4 about? Why not 3, or a thousand for that matter?
Origin
This expression first appeared in the 16th century in the form dire ses vérités. The "vérités" referred to whatever one thought were "true things." So, when a person "told their truths" to someone, they were saying "true" things about them, mainly negative, without hypocrisy, whether the person wanted to hear them or not. And this meaning hasn't really changed since then.
Why was the 4 added? According to lexicographers, despite the low numerical value, it should be seen as an intensifier, although there is no real explanation for choosing this number over any other. The "4 truths" in the expression symbolically imply a complete and unreserved account or assessment of a situation, as if there are 4 fundamental aspects that need to be addressed or revealed, 4 boxes to be checked. This choice is probably linked to immutable things like the 4 limbs of a person, the 4 seasons, the 4 cardinal points.
It's worth noting that the number 4 is used in many other French expressions, such as:
- couper les cheveux en 4 - split hairs (in 4,)
- se mettre en 4 - bend over backwards, go above and beyond
- ne pas y aller par 4 chemins - not beat around the bush
Examples
Ça fait longtemps que je veux lui dire ses 4 vérités, mais je n'ai jamais trouvé le bon moment.
I've been wanting to tell him some harsh truths for a long time, but I've never found the right moment.
Il est temps que quelqu'un lui dise ses 4 vérités et mette fin à ses illusions.
It's time someone told him the unvarnished truth and put an end to his illusions.